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People In Medieval Art Who Are Getting Stabbed But Just Don’t Give a Damn

The Middle Ages were very boring.  There was no YouTube, no Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl, no Bikinis, or even Fake Dog Poop.  They were trying times.  In order to cope with the “Gulfes of Boredome” they were immersed in, the Medievals invented wacky games to spice up their daily routines.  Since sex was, basically, illegal-as was washing-most of these pastimes involved violence, murder, death, and wedgies. Many of these Games were captured in the selfies of the day, which is known as “Art”.

The greatest artists of the Medieval period documented their life and times to the best of their primitive abilities, in an era also known as “The Era Where Seventh Graders With Issues Are Given Crayons and Allowed to Adorn Churches.”  Many of their famous works are included below.

 

#1 “Churning the Buttere”

Cheerful medieval art.

#2 “Hide And Seek”

#3 “Litte Lidse”

#4 “Bad Posture”

#5 “I’ll Drain You if You Drain Me”

#6  “Tickle the Ventricle”

#7 “Surprise Appendectomy”

#8 “Who Shallt Be Castrated?

#13 “Ye Shall be Cleaved!”

#14 “Kill the Man Without the Sword”

#15 “Night Falleth”

#16 “Thy Graile Is Mine”

#17 “Thy Graile Is Mine” [practice]

#18 “You’ve Stained The Sleeve!”

#19 “Pin The Knife To The Jugular”

#20 “A Little Off The Top”

#21 “You Want? I’ll Give!

 

 

 

 

 

 

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